Today finally I got time to sit back and think about the post that I should have written past week but didn’t get time to write anything. I missed my little ramblings on my blog, always look for a reason to write about whats going on my mind. It helps me to think more thoroughly and logically. I don’t know when we exactly got busy so much, may be it all started in January when we decided to look for Reva’s nursery. Yeah after all the deliema and anxiety, I finally decided to put her in the nursery for half day. Searching a good nursery took us whole 2 months. After couple of visits we finally got one and I am really glad about it. Then it took 2 weeks for Reva to settled in. I spend 2-3 hours every day with her in the nursery. Initial days were hard, when possible I sneaked out from the nursery leaving Reva behind and sat in the car, crying and worrying about the baby. First time she got sick after crying and I decided to quit but the manager told me it is expected and do give her a chance otherwise she will not able to conquer her fear. Reluctantly I did give a chance and believe me it was the worst time ever I had been through. As planned once she got busy in the nursery, I sneaked out and sat in the car. Every minute felt that my heart was ripped off from me. I was worrying about her and thinking what if she crying out loud and they would call me “Mrs Singh, your daughter is crying very hard, please hurry up”, after an hour manager came and told to me that she is happy and even had lunch with the other kids, so if you want you can go back to home and come back in an hour’s time. I was so relieved, felt like he pushed the heavy rock from my heart. I liked the way they settled Reva in the nursery. Slowly and steadily. Initially tt was too much, I felt guilty as well as also happy that she loved the place and like to play around. I think it took us a month to sync in with the idea and schedule.
Bringing up a baby has totally changed our lives. Everything changed so much that I never thought that it would, we have very little time for each other, there is change of conversation, out-of-our-hand routine which also brings the tensions and misunderstandings which then leads to some little and big fights. There are times when we both questioned our-selves that do we really belong to each other?, frown to each other when it felt that there is lost of appreciation, respect and hell lot of other things. I think this is the phase of marriage after 4 years and with a women who has no one to talk to, no one to share her feelings and nothing to appreciate about herself except sulking about life. What to do I am a Leo and Leo doesn’t belong at home all the time.
I am confident that we shall pass this phase as well because it is almost passed. You know when we sit back and think about what happened it always gave us a learning about each other and not to mention some laughs. I can say now we are maturing each day in our relationship which is a good sign, isn’t it ?
These days we are back on house hunt because our lease is going to expire in July. So far not good, I miss California when we think of apartments, every 2 bedroom house has 2 bathrooms with dishwasher and balcony. Here apartments are matchboxes but has everything we want. I don’t even dare to think the square footage of the flat, its like in six steps you cover the whole area, very disappointing. Independent houses are spacious but lacks facilities. Past week we saw 4-5 flat/house. Some were totally yuck, some were ok but not our type and the one we liked was rented out as soon as we made our mind. So hunt is on for next week as well. Why it is so hard to find a decent house? We are searching home since January, that time too there were useless houses in the market. We dropped the idea that time because we had been told that spring and summer is the best time when good property comes in the market. Actually as per the tradition we need to struggle a lot to get a house of our like, it happens all the time.
Conversation of London without talking about weather can not be over. Cold is back and this time with chilly cold gush of wind. You won’t believe past week there were 100 miles/hr wind warnings in Scotland. I have to reopen my winter cloths suitcases, what a disappointment. I so miss summer and really miss those 45 degrees of heat in India (I know it is too much to say but I want summer). We planned to go to sea beach this long weekend but stupid weather. Oh! Summer please come soon.